Some of you have heard this story before (hubby and Mom, for instance) so feel free to skip reading today. Or not. Your choice!
As so often happens, I’m not sure why I feel led to share this tale from my past. I only know that I do and when I do, I go with my gut.
Is this message for you? After you read it, please tell me!
Okay, here we go:
It was 2001. I “met” Deb on an online message board. We mostly wrote in the Prayer Requests section because we were both going through a bit of a crisis of faith. Soon enough, we began writing letters and cards and sending photos to each other. Occasionally, we talked on the phone.
Her name, on the board was Diamondzzzzzzzzzz – it might have been one less “z”. Ha! 🙂
One day, fairly early on, she sent me a letter. I don’t remember her exact words, but I clearly remember the meaning. And you know how we say, “It changed my life,” kinda flippantly? I know I have been accused of it… and, uh, little aside: I always mean it when I say it. It’s just that so much out there does! Ahem.
This seriously changed my life.
Deb wrote that she had something difficult to share but needed to say it.
She said that sometimes, people come into your life for a season… and they stay until it is time to go. These kinds of people are not meant to be friends for years. It’s not personal nor is it a conscious choice. It just is.
She said she loved me and wanted the best for me always but we would not grow old together as friends.
She said she wanted me to know because one day, she would disappear. It wasn’t now… but the day would come.
She said she didn’t want me to be hurt.
I remember that her message, which could have hurt like hell, instead felt nurturing and gentle. I don’t know if I acknowledged what she said nor not. All I remember is that I felt loved by her – truly – and that I knew, one day, it would be over.
And sure enough, several months later, another letter came… and it was the last time I ever heard from her.
Some have said that she was cruel but I NEVER saw it that way. I saw it as a gift! I still do.
Instead of seeing it as something hurtful, I wondered if Deb was sent as an angel at just the time I needed her? Maybe she was sent to stand in the gap or provide a soft landing… for I certainly needed one, having just begun my Canadian journey.
If Deb was an angel, perhaps God(dess) called her to minister to the next clunky human who needed some loving, you know?
I’ve never forgotten Deb or her message, though it’s been nearly twenty years. I have no idea where she is or what happened to her. I wouldn’t recognize her if I saw her. All I know is that she crosses my mind (quite often, actually) and when she does, I send a little prayer of thankfulness her way… and picture her diamondzzzzzzzzzzz twinkling back at me.