I am so thankful…
And tired. Really, really tired.
Reminds me of my dreams lately: non-existent.
In the months leading up to my new job, I dreamed of being lost, wandering the streets of my hometown in Southern California… in search of… home.
Other times, I was in the house in the desert with my children and their father, trying to work something out before I moved to Canada. Also, home.
About a month ago, the two dream worlds collided. My parents were at the house in the desert… and I was there, too, but my children and their father were not. It felt foreign and wrong.
I wrote it out. It felt so important! There was a message for me there. I wanted to work on it but I didn’t. I don’t know why. I certainly had the time.
Time. What a concept.
You know, there were days, only a month ago, when the hours flew by…. even though I wasn’t working and had literally nothing to do. Flew by! Like, I woke up, played Candy Crush, and then it was 5 pm and time for my husband to come home for dinner.
Did I actually feel like I had no time? Yes.
Cognitively, of course I knew I had oodles of time.
Except, I didn’t, too.
What the hell was I doing?
Not working on my dream, that’s for sure!
Now, I’m just (it’s been said) too tired. Too busy, legitimately so. Cramming my head with tons of brand new information.
And by 9ish… I’m beat. I go to bed and pretty-much pass out the moment my head hits the pillow.
Am I dreaming? I’m sure I am but I don’t remember anything. No wandering the streets. No house in the desert. No nothing.
I hope my dream life comes back soon. I miss it.
Also, I need to work on that dream. Maybe on the weekend.