I dislike the title of this book. There. I said it.
When I picked it up, I thought… what the heck does a comedian and game show host know about relationships and self-help? Turns out, quite a lot.
I still dislike the title. I want to scratch it out and write, “Act like whatever you want but here’s the stuff I think you need to know” by Steve Harvey. Sounds like a best seller, right? Ha!
Steve Harvey is no stranger to relationship problems or voicing his opinions about the mistakes he’s made. Three-time’s a charm in the marriage game, he’s been wed to his current wife since 2007. He’s learned a thing or two and wants you keep you from the missteps he’s taken.
And he’s a loud talker… in life and in print.
Not that he doesn’t have a soft side. He most certainly DOES.
But with sections like “How to be a girl on a date” (Don’t tell him you’ll drive. Seriously?) or “How to be a girl around the house” (Don’t take out the garbage. Seriously?)… I just can’t in all good conscience say this is a forward-thinking, progressive, woman-empowering book.
There are also sections like “You’ll know he’ll make a good father if…” (“He’s kind to his mother and checks in with her often” with the caveat “but mama’s boys need not apply.”)
There is gold in them thar words.
My FAVORITE chapter in the book is called “The Ninety-Day Rule” and it’s about good ol’ sex (although, sex is called “the cookie” in many places throughout the book… which is just … oh, I don’t know… gross?).
The subtitle to the chapter is: Getting the Respect You Deserve” and I’m on board with THAT. My favorite sentence in the book occurs in this chapter: Let’s just get right to the crux of this whole chapter: when a man asks for sex, and he is told no, his reaction to that no will tell you everything you need to know about him.
Truth. Again. See, there’s so much to be mined here!
Would this information be better coming from a woman… you know, since it’s supposedly about acting like a woman?
See, I find myself conflicted. Something isn’t right here.
Act like a man/dude/fella, think like a woman/chick/lady? No, that won’t work either.
When Harvey is talking about his own life, his own experiences, he is engaging. There really is so much to like about him… and parts of this book.
But. The other stuff.
Can’t get past it.
So, recommend? Yes, with a big caveat of my own. If you know who you are and just want to read about what he thinks… read and enjoy.
If you’re not quite sure who you are as a woman… and want direction… find a book by and for women.
Originally written by me for this blog on May 28, 2018￼